<?xml version="1.0"?>
<ownershipDocument>

    <schemaVersion>X0303</schemaVersion>

    <documentType>4</documentType>

    <periodOfReport>2009-02-27</periodOfReport>

    <notSubjectToSection16>0</notSubjectToSection16>

    <issuer>
        <issuerCik>0001253986</issuerCik>
        <issuerName>ARBOR REALTY TRUST INC</issuerName>
        <issuerTradingSymbol>ABR</issuerTradingSymbol>
    </issuer>

    <reportingOwner>
        <reportingOwnerId>
            <rptOwnerCik>0001285196</rptOwnerCik>
            <rptOwnerName>HELMREICH WILLIAM B</rptOwnerName>
        </reportingOwnerId>
        <reportingOwnerAddress>
            <rptOwnerStreet1>C/O ARBOR REALTY TRUST, INC.</rptOwnerStreet1>
            <rptOwnerStreet2>333 EARLE OVINGTON BLVD., STE. 900</rptOwnerStreet2>
            <rptOwnerCity>UNIONDALE</rptOwnerCity>
            <rptOwnerState>NY</rptOwnerState>
            <rptOwnerZipCode>11553</rptOwnerZipCode>
            <rptOwnerStateDescription></rptOwnerStateDescription>
        </reportingOwnerAddress>
        <reportingOwnerRelationship>
            <isDirector>1</isDirector>
            <isOfficer>0</isOfficer>
            <isTenPercentOwner>0</isTenPercentOwner>
            <isOther>0</isOther>
        </reportingOwnerRelationship>
    </reportingOwner>

    <nonDerivativeTable>
        <nonDerivativeTransaction>
            <securityTitle>
                <value>Common Stock par value $0.01</value>
            </securityTitle>
            <transactionDate>
                <value>2009-02-27</value>
            </transactionDate>
            <deemedExecutionDate></deemedExecutionDate>
            <transactionCoding>
                <transactionFormType>4</transactionFormType>
                <transactionCode>P</transactionCode>
                <equitySwapInvolved>0</equitySwapInvolved>
            </transactionCoding>
            <transactionTimeliness>
                <value></value>
            </transactionTimeliness>
            <transactionAmounts>
                <transactionShares>
                    <value>200</value>
                </transactionShares>
                <transactionPricePerShare>
                    <value>0.64</value>
                </transactionPricePerShare>
                <transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
                    <value>A</value>
                </transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
            </transactionAmounts>
            <postTransactionAmounts>
                <sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
                    <value>70300</value>
                </sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
            </postTransactionAmounts>
            <ownershipNature>
                <directOrIndirectOwnership>
                    <value>D</value>
                </directOrIndirectOwnership>
            </ownershipNature>
        </nonDerivativeTransaction>
        <nonDerivativeTransaction>
            <securityTitle>
                <value>Common Stock par value $0.01</value>
            </securityTitle>
            <transactionDate>
                <value>2009-02-27</value>
            </transactionDate>
            <deemedExecutionDate></deemedExecutionDate>
            <transactionCoding>
                <transactionFormType>4</transactionFormType>
                <transactionCode>P</transactionCode>
                <equitySwapInvolved>0</equitySwapInvolved>
            </transactionCoding>
            <transactionTimeliness>
                <value></value>
            </transactionTimeliness>
            <transactionAmounts>
                <transactionShares>
                    <value>300</value>
                </transactionShares>
                <transactionPricePerShare>
                    <value>0.65</value>
                </transactionPricePerShare>
                <transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
                    <value>A</value>
                </transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
            </transactionAmounts>
            <postTransactionAmounts>
                <sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
                    <value>70600</value>
                </sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
            </postTransactionAmounts>
            <ownershipNature>
                <directOrIndirectOwnership>
                    <value>D</value>
                </directOrIndirectOwnership>
            </ownershipNature>
        </nonDerivativeTransaction>
        <nonDerivativeTransaction>
            <securityTitle>
                <value>Common Stock par value $0.01</value>
            </securityTitle>
            <transactionDate>
                <value>2009-02-27</value>
            </transactionDate>
            <deemedExecutionDate></deemedExecutionDate>
            <transactionCoding>
                <transactionFormType>4</transactionFormType>
                <transactionCode>P</transactionCode>
                <equitySwapInvolved>0</equitySwapInvolved>
            </transactionCoding>
            <transactionTimeliness>
                <value></value>
            </transactionTimeliness>
            <transactionAmounts>
                <transactionShares>
                    <value>500</value>
                </transactionShares>
                <transactionPricePerShare>
                    <value>0.67</value>
                </transactionPricePerShare>
                <transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
                    <value>A</value>
                </transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
            </transactionAmounts>
            <postTransactionAmounts>
                <sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
                    <value>71100</value>
                </sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
            </postTransactionAmounts>
            <ownershipNature>
                <directOrIndirectOwnership>
                    <value>D</value>
                </directOrIndirectOwnership>
            </ownershipNature>
        </nonDerivativeTransaction>
        <nonDerivativeTransaction>
            <securityTitle>
                <value>Common Stock par value $0.01</value>
            </securityTitle>
            <transactionDate>
                <value>2009-02-27</value>
            </transactionDate>
            <deemedExecutionDate></deemedExecutionDate>
            <transactionCoding>
                <transactionFormType>4</transactionFormType>
                <transactionCode>P</transactionCode>
                <equitySwapInvolved>0</equitySwapInvolved>
            </transactionCoding>
            <transactionTimeliness>
                <value></value>
            </transactionTimeliness>
            <transactionAmounts>
                <transactionShares>
                    <value>800</value>
                </transactionShares>
                <transactionPricePerShare>
                    <value>0.68</value>
                </transactionPricePerShare>
                <transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
                    <value>A</value>
                </transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
            </transactionAmounts>
            <postTransactionAmounts>
                <sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
                    <value>71900</value>
                </sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
            </postTransactionAmounts>
            <ownershipNature>
                <directOrIndirectOwnership>
                    <value>D</value>
                </directOrIndirectOwnership>
            </ownershipNature>
        </nonDerivativeTransaction>
        <nonDerivativeTransaction>
            <securityTitle>
                <value>Common Stock par value $0.01</value>
            </securityTitle>
            <transactionDate>
                <value>2009-02-27</value>
            </transactionDate>
            <deemedExecutionDate></deemedExecutionDate>
            <transactionCoding>
                <transactionFormType>4</transactionFormType>
                <transactionCode>P</transactionCode>
                <equitySwapInvolved>0</equitySwapInvolved>
            </transactionCoding>
            <transactionTimeliness>
                <value></value>
            </transactionTimeliness>
            <transactionAmounts>
                <transactionShares>
                    <value>6500</value>
                </transactionShares>
                <transactionPricePerShare>
                    <value>0.69</value>
                </transactionPricePerShare>
                <transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
                    <value>A</value>
                </transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
            </transactionAmounts>
            <postTransactionAmounts>
                <sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
                    <value>78400</value>
                </sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
            </postTransactionAmounts>
            <ownershipNature>
                <directOrIndirectOwnership>
                    <value>D</value>
                </directOrIndirectOwnership>
            </ownershipNature>
        </nonDerivativeTransaction>
        <nonDerivativeTransaction>
            <securityTitle>
                <value>Common Stock par value $0.01</value>
            </securityTitle>
            <transactionDate>
                <value>2009-02-27</value>
            </transactionDate>
            <deemedExecutionDate></deemedExecutionDate>
            <transactionCoding>
                <transactionFormType>4</transactionFormType>
                <transactionCode>P</transactionCode>
                <equitySwapInvolved>0</equitySwapInvolved>
            </transactionCoding>
            <transactionTimeliness>
                <value></value>
            </transactionTimeliness>
            <transactionAmounts>
                <transactionShares>
                    <value>1700</value>
                </transactionShares>
                <transactionPricePerShare>
                    <value>0.70</value>
                </transactionPricePerShare>
                <transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
                    <value>A</value>
                </transactionAcquiredDisposedCode>
            </transactionAmounts>
            <postTransactionAmounts>
                <sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
                    <value>80100</value>
                </sharesOwnedFollowingTransaction>
            </postTransactionAmounts>
            <ownershipNature>
                <directOrIndirectOwnership>
                    <value>D</value>
                </directOrIndirectOwnership>
            </ownershipNature>
        </nonDerivativeTransaction>
    </nonDerivativeTable>

    <footnotes></footnotes>

    <remarks></remarks>

    <ownerSignature>
        <signatureName>/s/ Walter K. Horn, Attorney-In-Fact for William B. Helmreich</signatureName>
        <signatureDate>2009-03-03</signatureDate>
    </ownerSignature>
</ownershipDocument>
